We have been dating long distance for a year besides about 3 months for the summer. I love him to death but we recently got into a fight and broke up bc he is too controlling. We made up and discussed a mature relationship guidelines. But after that lately he annoys me so much and I don't know why. I do love him. I just don't enjoy talking to him much anymore. He's too emotional and mopey all the time.
Have you communicated how he makes you fell lately with him? I have said this time and time again communication is key!
Hi, I met my ldr girlfriend about 2 months ago. When we first met we talked heaps on Facebook and for hours on end. But now it seems that when we do have conversation it's very quite dull and uninteresting. Also I'm usually the one that Initiates the conversation, when we are talking she rarely asks questions and I'm just sitting there thinking of things to say to keep conversation flowing. We have both stated that we both love each other a lot. What can I do to make conversation more lively
Have you heard the saying ” It takes two to tango!”, well it applies to various aspects of our lives. For example, this one you both need to interact, to actively listen in order to have a lively conversation. Tell her to put her part, because like I’ve said endlessly Communication is KEY.
Hey! Thanks for replying my message! I’m the Filipino girl who lives in Canada lol. I hope being open to him won’t become an issue or fight. He’s been changing though since the last time I caught him cheating. He sends me pictures through Facebook of what he does everyday, and we constantly Skype. I just don’t know if it’s enough. Thanks so much! God bless!
Do you think he is sending these pictures out of guilt? Anyways, good luck love!
We met in Hawai’i on a camping trip. It was not love at first sight; he was everything I was not, and not usually the type I would go for. We were complete opposites, and came from two entirely different places and families. Over the three weeks we spent together along with 8 other individuals, we became friends after five days of awkward conversations. However, during those three weeks together, we became amazing friends, always joking around…constantly laughing and smiling together. We experienced the amazing wonders of Hawai’i, which only made our time together more memorable. During our last week, he acted more affectionately, but nothing beyond flirting. Each night, when we camped out on the beach, we would stay up late, without a care for the time, and talk under the stars. We talked about everything and anything. He shared with me so much about his life and himself, stuff he had never told anyone else. While he shared personal things about himself, I tried to share secrets about myself, but I wasn’t ready yet. Throughout our time together, he helped me to realize that I need to live for myself and forget the expectations that other people have for me. He helped me find myself, something people never find in their entire lives. He opened my eyes to what was most important in life and helped me to realize I need not to worry about petty things, because you only live once. On our very last night in Hawai’i before we would depart back home, we stayed away all night on the beach in a sleeping bag. He held me all night, and it was the happiest I had ever been in so so long. I forgot all about my severe anxiety that I deal with on a daily basis and everything else that stressed me out. Finally, he kissed me and it was amazing. I have never felt so much in one kiss. Something I will never forget. Unfortunately, we live on complete opposite sides of the U.S., hundreds of miles apart from each other. We have talked every day, and I’m falling for him so intensely. I’ve never felt this way about anyone, I’ve never loved anyone, but he is changing that for me. It’s been four months since I’ve been able to see him, and it’s so incredibly hard. I cry myself to sleep sometimes and he’s the only thing I think about all day. All I want to do is be with him, but it won’t be for several more months that I will get to be in his arms. I don’t know how to deal with all of this, and I know I’m so young, but I really am in love with him. He has taught me so much about life and happiness, and beyond the physical attraction there is something so much greater, and that’s how I know I love him. So, all I can do is wait, and maybe one day we will really be together.
Would love to hear your thoughts, please let me know!
Rachel, I think that although your feelings for him are strong you need to learn how to not depend on him so much for your happiness. Don’t get me wrong, fall for him, learn what it feels like to be in love, but understand that with a LDR there are struggles, and those struggles aren’t easily overcome. You need to realize that what you feel, people have felt for years. If you’re ready to feel this over and over again, then all I can recommend with helping you cope with these emotions is to keep yourself preoccupied, join clubs, start something you’ve wanted to do, get out there. You’ll make time for him when you both are free, but you need to live your life for yourself.
How does a couple who has been together for a year and half can do about the silence? We have been proposed to play games online but we can't find any. None of us has topics to about. And talking about the day doesn't help much.
I ask myself how I do this everyday with Tre, and honestly we start with one conversation and just branch off to others!
hi! i'm writing as someone in a ldr , that just celebrated a 4 yr anniversary. i just feel like posting a little bit of a positive vibe, and that i think its great the support you have for your followers! your advice i have found is spot on, and i read things and go 'yup, nailed it.' communication and trust is definitely the biggest tools in the kit, and we must always remember we are forever learning. we can only be here for each other, so keep it up! xx
Thank you so much! It means loads to me that another LDR feels the same way I do, and agrees with my advice!
Hi. I'm in a long distance relationship. I'm in Canada and he's back home in the Philippines. He courted me for like a year and we finally became official for 4 months now but when I was still back home at the Philippines, he cheated on me three times and now that I'm in Canada I'm having such a hard time trusting him. I'm scared that my doubts might become the downfall of our relationship but I'm not ready to be taken as a fool again.
Make a stand, make it clear that you have doubts in him and that you still think he will.
Hello! I recently started following you on my ldr blog. I've actually followed a couple of people because you guys and all the other followers are understanding and sympathetic to each others relationships. I'm actually trying to reach out to a couple people. Me and my boyfriend (a year in January) are taking a break for a month. These first 6 days are killing me and I wish I had people to talk to about it but I don't. I cry everyday at least once, how do you talk about something like this?
You don’t reminisce, in fact you learn to pre-occupy yourself. Keeping yourself busy will tend to keep you from wandering thoughts. I personally wouldn’t recommend that you talk to someone about it, because once you do you’ll just get back in the blanket of sadness.
Me and my boyfriend are in a LDR but we have been best friends for 7 years so we are very very comfortable around each other. Our sex is great, and I'm not shy around him at all, but I for some reason can't get myself to send him sexy photos or do anything on webcam...I don't know what's wrong with me! Did you ever have the same problem?
Yes and no.
Yes I had/have the same issue because I’m big on privacy ( as in someone getting his phone and seeing the pictures). Also I have to factor in my career plan and how it may affect me in the long run.
When it comes to video chatting I have no issue revealing things to him, because I believe it to be a bit safer.
Ldr, for four years, with a girl 998.2 miles away, I love her with all my heart but she's doubting that it will work out much longer and I think she's scared.. (We're both yet to graduate high school) How can I reassure her and show her it will work and what can I do to surprise her from this far?
Hell you can use my relationship as an example, 6 years !
We started dating in high school, and now throughout college. We’ve had our ups and downs as any relationship would, but I can’t imagine losing my best friend, my fiance, and the love of my life.
I was in a LDR for 2 months. (June to August 31) It's been a while since we broke up but I miss him so much. I think I still love him. We don't talk anymore and I'm just so depressed about it. He was also like my best friend. How do I move on?
Keep yourself pre-occupied! Go do things, hang out with friends, participate in extra curricular activities. It helps, believe me.
Hi! I want to ask something, well I have been dating with a guy approximately 2 months, but the problem is that we are both a thousand miles apart. Though he told me at first that he likes me then for some time he confesses that he loves me. But the problem is that, a lot of things has been running up with my mind, like how could you tell if the guy is really in love with you? And is not only playing with your emotions.
This is a question that can have a thousand different answers!
I think that when it comes to an LDR in order for someone to fall in love with another it mostly depends on your personality and character. Obviously looks play a part, whether it be through video chat or pictures.
We as humans have an instinct or something that guides us in whether or not someone is being truthful or not, I would say go with that and take into consideration how he/she treats you as it also plays a part in whether you believe them.
I've been in a long distance relationship for about 2 years with someone i have never met. We do plan on meeting. The time difference is such a buzzkill, but we manage to make it work. Any advice on how to stay strong and keep the connection alive?
Humor, is another key I find essential in any relationship. You then long the laughter, the jokes, the sense of humor of one another. Try that, there are obviously different methods but that one is my favourite.
Hello. My ldb and I have been together for almost 11 months now and the last time we've seen each other was in January. He is visiting in a day or so. Generally we are very close. However I feel like we've been having a falling out the last couple months after we had a very personal talk about our past regarding sexual abuse. I was able to speak about mine but he says its too painful for him to talk about his. and that he thinks he'll lose me. trust me. ive nagged
When he is with you you have to make him believe ( because it seems he’s still doubtful of himself when it comes to losing you) that you are not going anywhere, that you are his outlet for venting, for secrets, his fortress.. make him comfortable. There are obviously different approaches to this, but I recommend that one.
I met this guy on the Internet and we literally talk 24/7 for over a month. I fell in love with him because he is literally everything I look for in a guy and he said the same thing to me. Last week he told me he got a girlfriend, he said she was a me but just lived closer. I still can't stop thinking about him. We have snapchated a couple of times. What do I do?
Do you see yourself waiting for him, or him ending it with her? If so, then just wait unless you’re ready to move on then go right ahead and move on. He is a lesson learned.
We are a duet and we are in a LDR! England & Venezuela! could u support us? there is a video with one of our original songs called "I knew but I didn't know" and its about long distance .Hope u enjoy it! we are called "Long Distance" find us on twitter @LDmusicLD
So, this isn't entirely related to the distance, but my boyfriend is 23 and I am 17.. on a scale of 1 to 10 how wrong is that?
Do you think it’s wrong, or deserves to be rated on a scale of “How wrong” it may be? If you’re happy, go for it ( obviously legally it depends on the state you live in, whether or not it may be illegal, and/or require your parents consent should anything happen).
18 yo m, dating a girl I met on fb, and she lives 3 states away. I love her with all of my heart, but I've only been able to see her once. After about 2 months of long distance things kinda slowed down, less to talk about etc. So I went to visit her, everything was great and our relationship kinda picked back up even after I left. But now maybe 3 months later things are slowing down again, and I can't go back to see her right now. What can I do to keep the relationship going? I Can't lose her :(
Talk to her about it, don’t think that the solution is visiting her because you won’t be able to see her that often ( the situation you’re currently in). Communication is KEY
Were 15. How do I convince my parents to let me go stay with him when he lives two provinces away? We really miss each other and I don't wanna sound pushy but I want him to come visit me! How do I ask? I told my parents all about him and she thinks we're soul mates. We're in a long distance relationship but idk how long we can make this last when it's expensive and a hassle to see each other. All I want is him, but the distance is awful. How am I going to make this work? Help
You shouldn’t be asking yourself ” How am I going to make this work?”, because you’re not the only one in the relationship. He should also be making an effort to see you. As for convincing your parents, why not have them meet over facetime/skype? maybe they’ll connect, and possibly have both parents meet ( as in his and yours). I’m sure once they see them with their eyes, and talk to them they’ll open up to the idea.
Sometimes my boyfriend gets really quiet on skype, i feel like we don't have nothing to talk about, but when i start to talk he talks too, but he never like start a conversation, if i dont say something, he wont and i know why he's quiet because of things that happened in the past with him, but it really gets on my nerves and its SO BORING, i really love him and he loves me, but i dont want the constant awkward silence and its like for hours..
Look back at a couple of my asks, your answers are all there my dear!
Hi. I've been in a long distance relationship with a man that I met online for almost 3 years now. I have to wait 4 more years until I can finally see him in person. Do you have any tips on how to keep our relationship strong and interesting?
I know that can be vague but I’ll clarify it for you.
Does he like video games ( Computer Games, XBOX, PS3) ? if he does try getting into the games to, or read up on it a bit. Get involved in other parts of his life aside from just your relationship with him.
Does he have a favorite show?
You see where I’m going here, get to know more about him, and that time will FLY by!
Hey well I am in a long distance relationship and well we met about 3 months ago while I was on summer vacation & we instantly connected. He asked me out 3 weeks later & I gotta say I miss him so much and I've only been away for 3 weeks. I won't see him in 2 years. It gets harder and harder. I cry at night and I wonder if he misses me
He does miss you. Guys have this belief that they have to not show emotion and be “tough” for their girls. While at some times it is true, other we wonder if they do actually feel emotions, and I can guarantee you that he does. How? Because if he didn’t he wouldn’t have told you those sweet things that one day you two were together.
I know it can get hard sometimes, the whole getting accustomed to not being with him. But over time it does get easier, you get accustomed to the idea of seeing him in X days, X hours, X minutes, X seconds. You just have to remember all of the good things, and let those memories be the first thing that pop into your head when you think of his name.
I've been in a LDR with my boyfriend for almost 5 month now. Recently we got into many fights but we always cleared things. What I've noticed now is that the way he communicates with me is not the same anymore. Like there's no sweet talking or calling me with endearing nicknames anymore. Maybe it's because he's kinda still mad or it's because of something else I don't know. What should I do? Should I ask him why he's like that or just give him some time?
Honestly, if it bothers you enough talk to him about it. The issues you have in your relationship will never resolve themselves if either of you try to fix the issue.